If You’ve Only Got a Moustache

A comic song from 1864
Words by George Cooper
Music by Stephen C. Foster


The sheet music:


Accompaniment by Werner Tomaschewski:


Accompaniment by Benjamin R. Tubb:


Lyrics

  1. Oh! all of you poor single men,
    Don’t ever give up in despair,
    For there’s always a chance while there’s life
    To capture the hearts of the fair,
    No matter what may be your age,
    You always may cut a fine dash,
    You will suit all the girls to a hair
    If you’ve only got a moustache,
    A moustache, a moustache,
    If you’ve only got a moustache
  2. No matter for manners or style,
    No matter for birth or for fame,
    All these used to have something to do
    With young ladies changing their name,
    There’s no reason now to despond,
    Or go and do any thing rash,
    For you’ll do though you can’t raise a cent,
    If you’ll only raise a moustache!
    A moustache, a moustache,
    If you’ll only raise a moustache
  3. Your head may be thick as a block,
    And empty as any foot-ball,
    Oh! your eyes may be green as the grass
    Your heart just as hard as a wall.
    Yet take the advice that I give,
    You’ll soon gain affection and cash,
    And will be all the rage with the girls,
    If you’ll only get a moustache,
    A moustache, a moustache,
    If you’ll only get a moustache
  4. I once was in sorrow and tears
    Because I was jilted you know,
    So right down to the river I ran
    To quickly dispose of my woe,
    A good friend he gave me advice
    And timely prevented the splash,
    Now at home I’ve a wife and ten heirs,
    And all through a handsome moustache,
    A moustache, a moustache,
    And all through a handsome moustache

Sung here by Vancha March: