A popular song from 1900.
Words and music by Herbert Rutter & Harry Lauder.
The sheet music:
Accompaniment by James Pitt-Payne:
Lyrics
- Now Calligan, the tailor, always used to make my clothes
And I always used to pay so much a week
He always used to suit me well, and never did I suppose
He’d prove himself a very nasty sneak
Some time ago from Calligan, a pair of pants I bought
But since I’ve had them trousers
Well, my work has fallen short
I missed him for a fort-night as I’d not the cash to pay
So when he called upon me for his cash the other day
Chorus:
Said I to Calligan, “You’ll have to call again”
“Call again?” said Calligan, “Not I”
Said I to Calligan, “You’ll have to call again
For I haven’t got your M-O-N-E-Y”
Calligan vowed that he wouldn’t call again
He swore he’d put the coppers on my track
Well, my temper rose, and then said I to Calligan
“Call again and take your trousers back”
- “Calligan,” said I to him, “I’ve dealt with you for years
And you must admit you’ve always found me straight
And so I will be this time, but, in spite of all your fears
There’s not the slightest doubt you’ll have to wait
“Wait bedad!” said Calligan, and then his temper rose
We argued till I really thought our words would come to blows
Said he, “Now when do you intend to settle up this score?”
I said, “When we go on full time,” and then again once more - Calligan, quite angry, said no longer would he wait
Though I told him I would pay him fair and square
He told me for to take them off, tho’ I to him did state
That they were all that I had got to wear
“Take them off,” said Calligan, “I’ll take them back with me
And I’ll let you have them back when you can pay the L. S. D.
Said I to him, “What shall I be without a pair of pants?”
Said he, “A living picture or else table-aux-vivants”
Sung by Vancha March: